Rhonda’s Ramblings

I can’t believe that it has been over two years since I’ve posted here. I blame it mostly on Jason!

A lot has happened in the last couple of years. I quit my job, took a drive around the country and then moved to a somewhat remote area of northern California. Okay, we do have a Walmart nearby, so it is not that remote. But it is pretty small and isolated.

I moved here to see if things would work out with a guy I met. And things ended up working out wonderfully!

I am now Mrs. Meadows. Except I would prefer not to be called that. It sounds like I’m old. I will answer to Rhonda Meadows though. Isn’t it a perfectly delightful last name?

Since I haven’t been updating my blog. It’s taken me a couple of months to introduce my new friend Harper.

Harper is the brother to Daxon and Tayven.

Leave the Pieces by The Wreckers

You’re not sure that you love me
But you’re not sure enough to let me go
Baby it ain’t fair you know to just keep me hangin round
You say you don’t wanna hurt me
Don’t wanna see my tears
So why are you still standing here just watchin me drown

And it’s alright, yeah I’ll be fine
Don’t worry about this heart of mine
Just, take your love and hit the road
There’s nothing you can do or say
You’re gonna break my heart anyway
So just, leave the pieces when you go

Now you can drag out the heartache
Or baby you can make it quick
Really get it over with and just let me move on
Don’t concern yourself with this mess you left for me
I can clean it up you see just as long as you’re gone

And it’s alright, yeah I’ll be fine
Don’t worry about this heart of mine
Just, take your love and hit the road
There’s nothing you can do or say
You’re gonna break my heart anyway
So just leave the pieces when you go

You’re not making up your mind
It’s killing me wasting time
I need so much more than that
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

And it’s alright, yeah I’ll be fine
Don’t worry about this heart of mine
Just, take your love and hit the road
There’s nothing you can do or say
You’re gonna break my heart anyway
So just leave the pieces when you go
Leave the pieces when you go
Leave the pieces when you go

Since I haven’t posted in forever, I’m gonna cheat and do one of these chain things. Bethany tagged me for this a LONG time ago…and I’m finally getting around to doing it.

Seven Things to Do Before I Die:
1. Get married and have a “quiver full” of kids (does that count as one thing?)
2. Start a “classroom garden” or children’s garden
3. Travel to all of the continents (only South America and Antarctica left)
4. Complete a beautiful quilt. (Not just a square block pattern)
5. Buy the house I’m living in.
6. Raise chickens.
7. Write a book.

Seven Things I Cannot Do:
1. Dance
2. Stay organized
3. Speak another language fluently
4. Get a date (with someone who loves Jesus)
5. See a daffodil without smiling and overflowing with joy.
6. Keep a journal consistently
7. (I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me )

Seven Things that (will) Attract Me to My Spouse/Significant Other :
1. His love for the Lord and desire to know the Lord more and more
2. His integrity and character and the fact that his friends respect him
3. His love for and desire to have children
4. His sense of humor and dorkiness and love of laughter
5. The fact that his family is really important to him
6. His utter sexiness that shows when he is sweaty and dirty from working hard.
7. The fact that he loves me.

Seven Things I Say (or write!) Most Often:
1. Anyway
2. Are you ready to order?
3. That’s cool.
4. Whatever
5. I would love to do/go/see _________ someday.
6. Haha
7. So…..

Seven Books (or series) I Love:
1. Shadow of the Almighty: The Life and Testament of Jim Elliot -Elisabeth Elliot
2 Anne of Green Gables series - L.M. Montgomery
3. Soul Survivor (How Thirteen Unlikely Mentors Helped My Faith Survive the Church)- Phillip Yancey
4. Girl Meets God - Lauren Winner
5. The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants Series - Ann Brashares
6. Prodigal Summer - Barbara Kingsolver
7. Walk Across America - Peter Jenkins

Seven Movies I Would Watch Over and Over Again: (This one was hard, since I don’t watch movies that often….and my list ended up being too many chick flicks. Oh well.)
1. You’ve Got Mail
2. The Power of One
3. The Cutting Edge
4. Sweet Home Alabama
5. Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants
6. Tommy Boy
7. Hope Floats

Seven People I Want to Join in - if they wish:
I think I’m the last person on the internet to do this.

That was harder than I thought it would be.

There are daffodils blooming in my front yard. Which brings me so much joy. It’s silly, really.

And I’m quite enjoying taking photos of them with my new camera.

Yes, I’m still around. Just not online that much these days. And still trying to recover a bit healthwise. The double vision went away, but then the numbness in the lower half of my body began. That is gone now, too, which makes me happy. But I’m still sleeping all the time when I’m not at work.

But I had a great holiday season. My sister and her husband visited for a week and I got to spend time with my mom and brother as well. I love my family.

And daffodils.

Dearest eyes,

I never knew how much I loved you. I’m so sorry that I took you for granted. Thank you for all these years of faithfulness, with me barely uttering a word of thanks. I never realized how hard you worked for me, until you decided not to work so hard for me. I never knew how many muscles you had until those muscles have been getting sore by the end of the day. And for the record, I’m not a fan of double vision, so if you could go back to the single vision, I’d love it. And soon. Thanks so much.

Your biggest fan,
Rhonda

Look at me. I redesigned my blog all by myself. OK…so, I mainly just stole things. But I like it.

And isn’t that the COOLEST header that Jason designed for me. He did it SO long ago, before I really knew him. Not like we are best friends now. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against him. I think he’s great. What I’m really trying to say is how very nice it was of him to design that for me when he barely knew me. And how he was so able to capture what I love.

And if the header image doesn’t show up for you, I’m gonna cry. I’m sure there are problems, but I’ll figure those out later. And I’m hoping the comments aren’t broken.

For now, I’m gonna enjoy this new look. And hope that you guys can see it as well. If not, then it’s back to the drawing board. (and I am back to my old theme)

It’s 3:56 a.m. and I am still awake. listening to some Andy Osenga.

I started organizing my cds, and that let to cleaning out some drawers in my room, which led to me finding some frames that I have been wanting to find pictures for. So, I almost opened up that Pandora’s Box of going through my photos, but then decided that would not be a wise choice..

I have way too much junk. I’m not sure how I have accumulated so much stuff in my short little life. And my sister and I just had a yard sale about two months ago. Much of my junk consists of craft items. Most of these haven’t been used in a while. But I save them because I don’t want to have to go out and buy them again when I am doing a craft project that needs that particular item. And I always think I will spend more time doing crafts than I actually do. I can’t tell you how many projects I have that are half finished.

Sometimes I wish I weren’t an American consumer. I wish that I didn’t have so many possessions and that I would be content with just a few things. Every year or so, I go through a stage where I really want to simplify and go “back to essentials, a chair and a lamp and the book that You wrote to me” (Margaret Becker). But the fact is, I like my stuff. If I had to live without it, I would. And probably wouldn’t be overly upset about it, but I do enjoy this stuff. And I continue to accumulate more stuff. Today, I got a really cute and fun picnic basket at the thrift store. Totally unecessary, but I love it.

Tomorrow is my only day off this week. And I don’t have any plans, which makes me happy. Of course, there are lots of things I need to catch up on. Bills, and cleaning and laundry and fun stuff like that. But I don’t have to be anywhere at any certain time. And I can just do stuff around the house and listen to all the cds that I rediscovered after reorganizing my cds.

And

Last night, the families that live in the houses next to me came to eat at the restaurant where I work. Then I saw them at church this morning. And while I was walking home from church, one of these same neighbors asked me if I could watch her two kids for a couple of hours this afternoon. Which I happily agreed to, in exchange for her letting me borrow some milk. Then about 30 minutes later, another of my neighbors brought over some lilac suckers that she had dug out of her yard, thinking that I might like to plant them. I shared some of the bounty of my garden with her. While I was watching the girls, I baked a cake for the son of one of the ladies that I work with. (He is 4 years old, and this was his first birthday cake )

This is community to me. And I love it. It makes me want to stay here.

And a story to reinforce what an old lady I am.

I never take Friday nights off. I did take one off the weekend of my sister’s wedding. And for a few other important things, but it is rare. Sure, it’s because usually I have nobody to cover for me. But this week, despite being super short on waitresses, I was able to tweak the schedule, so I work lunch instead of dinner. And what am I doing on Friday night? Going to a Taste of Home cooking school.

During the entertaining 2-hour presentation, you’ll hear humorous anecdotes plus handy tips, garnishing ideas and much more to make meal preparation easy and fun. Every guest will leave with a gift bag full of product samples, valuable coupons and the newest Taste of Home Brand Name Recipe Cookbook with over 150 recipes.

I think the cookbook alone is worth the $12 entrance fee. (I bought three of the past year’s cookbooks at the thrift store and I love them.)

I know that you all have been waiting with bated breath to find out which statement on my previous post was a lie. I answered it in my comments. You were all wrong, by the way.

20 things about me that might surprise you. (then again…they might not)

1. I have never attended a public school. (Wait, I did take one college course at a junior college)
2. I am quite messy.
3. I don’t own any make-up.
4. I own and wear lots of skirts.
5. I (and my family) were homeless on more than one occasion when I was a child.
6. I have “internet friends” Okay, that doesn’t suprise you, since if you are reading this, you probably are an internet friend. Maybe it’s more suprising that I have real life friends.
7. I have a kajillion fillings. Maybe not a kajillion. But I’ve got a mouth full of metal. Horrible teeth, yet I think my best feature is my smile.
8. I’m not a very good manager because I am not very good at telling people what to do. I guess I feel like they have all worked there long enough that they should know what to do without me telling them. (But I was such a bossy kid.)
9. I have never kissed a guy.
10. I am in love.
11. I have been naked in public.
12. I am kind of a picky eater.
13. I don’t have my ears pierced.
14. I have read Shadow of the Almighty at least 20 times.
15. I don’t have a best friend.
16. I have 5 goldfish and half of a cat.
17. The only t.v. in my house is a 10″ black and white set that my friend got for free on the side of the road.
18. My family life growing up was “highly dysfunctional”
19. I listen to country music quite a bit.
20. My kitchen is decorated with strawberries.

Wow. That was harder than I thought it would be. I haven’t hidden much from my internet friends, apparently. I am an open book.

So, did any of that surprise you?

One thing in that list is not true. Which do you think it is?

I know that it is Friday for most of you. But it is my Monday.

And it didn’t start off so well. I got to work today to discover that the other waitress that was supposed to have been there an hour earlier didn’t show up. She finally showed up over an hour late. And then she told me that she has another job. I’m already working lots of extra shifts as it is. So, I really need to hire a wonderful waitress, and have her trained and ready to go in two weeks.

Yeah, right. I’ve hired and trained SO many people in the last few months. And most of them didn’t make it.

I was just in the middle of writing a post about finding a box of my grandparent’s old pictures. But then my computer froze and I lost it.

But the basic points were:

1. My dad had big ears.
2. My grandparents loved National Parks (I think I got my love for National Parks from them)
3. I love seeing pictures of my dad and my grandparents in stages of life that I did not know them.

In other news, I am continuing my boring life and loving it. I have three days off in a row, which is quite rare. And so I’m spending the time baking, sewing and working in the garden.

I have really been praying and looking for opportunities to get to know my neighbors better. Since I live in a tiny little town, I really want it to be a part of my community. The two families that live to the west of me go to my church so that has given me a bit of an opportunity to get to know them better and to teach their kids in Sunday School. And this week, a couple of things happened that opened the door for me to pray with my next-door neighbor Jennifer, and to watch her kids while she ran some important errands. So, God is working things out. And she has adorably cute kids.

I could tell you all the details of the last few days. (I got my hair cut, I made zucchini bread, I made some new Russian friends.) But instead, I’m gonna talk about singleness again. know, I know. I talk way too much about singleness. But I’m single. If I were married, I’d probably blog about marriage. But after all, I am the poster child for perpetual singleness.

As my new friend Oksana and I were in the car together for a couple of hours, we got to know each other, and asked the usual questions. She asked me what I really wanted to do in life. (Because she just guessed that I didn’t want to work at the Northridge forever.) And what was my answer? Well, there are SO many things that I would like to do. Too many to list. But at the top of my list is being a wife and a mom. That’s what I’d really like to do. She kind of looked at me with a confused look…expecting me to add some other important thing, like being the high ranking employee in the corporate world or something like that. She gave the common response, a version of “Is that all?”. And no, that’s not all. I would love to do so many things, like start a garden classroom and get my Master’s. But I really want to be a wife and mom. I don’t think it’s that crazy of a goal.

The thing is how I approach it.

I am a goal setter in general. I don’t reach a lot of my goals. But I do reach a good number of them. I achieved most of the things on my “Things to do before I’m 25″ list. I’m the type of person who really thinks that I can accomplish most things if I just apply myself enough and have enough discipline. Of course, I am often not disciplined enough. But if I want something badly enough to be disciplined, I can achieve that goal.

But I don’t think that way about getting married. I think of it as something that I don’t really have much control over. It’s not a goal that I can set, and can make a list of the things I need to do to accomplish that goal. It’s something that is very dependent on other outside factors. Like the guy. So, maybe I need to change my mindset. Or maybe I need to think about it a lot less. Or maybe it’s just a different type of goal. One that I don’t have much control over.

Yesterday I went to the river with Colleen and her two boys. A river day with them has been long overdue…with the crazyness in both of our lives. (Her house recently burnt down, and she has an almost 3 year old, a 10 month old and another on the way.) It was great to catch up with her and play with her adorable kids.

So, after leaving her house, I decided to stop by the Salvation Army on the way home. (I love thrift stores.) And guess who I ran into? My mom. Which is more random than it may seem. I rarely see her, since I work evenings and she works days and we live in totally different towns. So, after we both completed our shopping, we went out to dinner together. (I got a dress and some overalls, and some red boots??…at the thrift store, not for dinner.) And I think I got a love for thrift stores from my mom.

We had a wonderful time at dinner discussing our struggles in life and jobs and love and guys and beating them up. Okay, maybe we didn’t talk about beating them up, but we did talk about giving them a good talking to. And my perpetual singleness. Which seems to be a hot topic lately. At work and on the board and at dinner with my mom.

And if you think you might know the/a reason why I am still single, then tell me (I mean something that is “wrong” with me, not “because it’s God’s will”). Seriously. I want to know what my glaring flaws are. Because I really am baffled that I’ve never been on a date. (This is not a “I suck, I’m single, and life is horrible” statement. It’s just curiosity.) I like to ask for trouble.

Yesterday I took the postal service exam, along with about 150 other people. And ours just one session of eight being held in my area. There were 15 choices of post offices to workat, ane wed could only choose three. Once you pass the test, you are put on a list for future employment at those offices for the next two years. And when jobs come up, you are given preference according to your score. So, I’m not sure how many job openings there really are.
But I was surprised at how rude and stupid people are. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, but I still am.
First of all, they told us about 25 times to make sure that our cell phones are off. But did people turn off their phones? Of course not.
And people just can’t listen, I guess. Because they couldn’t follow simple directions like “Don’t open the book until I tell you to.” Or “Sit in this seat”. Plus people are just rude and dont’ treat people with respect.
My favorite moment was when one of the test takers wanted to get the attention of one of the men who was helping to administer the test. So, he called out to him, “Hey, old man!”. Nice. Do they not realize that they are trying to get employment? The funny thing was that the head test administrator heard him say it, and chastized him in front of everybody, and then told us that they were also a part of the interview committee as well. Nice way to make a good impression.\

In other news, I went to Walmart yesterday to return some things that my sister got at a wedding shower. Apparently, you can only return items without a receipt 3 times a year. And you only get store credit. Apparently this discourages people from stealing things and then returning them. So, they take your license number and put you into the computer. Well, when the cashier looked at my license, and said, “Oh my word”, I knew what was coming. Some comment about how I look so young, or how I look so different, or is that really me. I knew this was coming because I have received omments like that so many times in the past couple of months. But never before….though I have had this license picture since the week before my 21st birthday…so, a good 8 1/2 years. But apparently I have aged a lot in the past couple of months. Every time I use my credit card or go to Blockbuster, I am reminded of this. Granted, I look very sad in my picture. I don’t know why. And I do look quite young. I’m just curious why this is suddenly noticeable to everyone who checks my I.D.

In other, other news, I have taken up a new habit. Well, it’s not a habit yet, since I have only been doing it for three or four days. But I have been riding my (sister’s) bike to the post office at night. It is not very far, but it is all uphill, so my legs are like jelly when I get there. But nothing beats riding back down the hill. The wind at your face, the blanket of stars above you the crickets cricketing. The last two days I did it a tiny bit after dusk, when there was still light in the sky. But tonight, I rode after I got home from work at about 10:30 and it was much darker but enjoyable.

And in other, other, other news…I have lots of tomatoes and I don’t know what to do with all of them.

The House

Front Porch

Overgrown sunflowers in the backyard.

Porch Swing

My vegetable garden

Rose bush in the backyard.

There are lots more, but that will do for now.

I’m not super creative or artistic. But I am crafty. And there is a difference. I can’t take a blank canvas and create some beautiful masterpiece. I can’t envision something really artistic and then create it. But I can make greeting cards or scrapbook pages with stickers, paper and embellishments that I buy from the store. But I pretty much do variations of the same thing every time. Nothing extremely creative.

I spent yesterday evening making cards, and it reminded me how much I enjoy doing “crafty” things. I haven’t done much lately, mostly because it’s summer, and I don’t love spending my free time inside. Or because we were planning a wedding. But that’s one thing I like about the winter. I can stay inside on the cold winter evenings and work on craft projects. I need to be more crafty.

So, tonight, one of my waitresses walked out at the beginning of her shift. (I don’t even know why…some dumb drama with a cook) That left just me and a new food runner (it was her 2nd day) on a Saturday night. And then I got 2 parties of 8 and a party of 10. Plus all of the regular parties of 2, 3, or 4. So, out came Super Waitress. OK, not really, but I am a good waitress. What a great thing to be good at. My food runner was amazing and Carlos (my boss) helped pour beer and help the guys at the bar. And I it all worked out fine.

But, it means that I probably won’t be able to go to the reception that my sister and her husband are having in his home town. I don’t like being in charge…and therefore having to cover when there is nobody to work. I’d rather just go back to being the lowly waitress at the bottom of the totem pole. But then again, I probably wouldn’t be able to get the time off that I want.

I read The Third Summer of the Sisterhood today. And I was trying to decide which character I most relate to. And I decided there are pieces of all them that resonate with me.

But a couple of quotes really stood out to me and hit me where I’m at, thatI immediately related to situations in my life.

She’d (Bridget) rather go through her life doubting that such a thing was possible than knowing it was real and she couldn’t have it.
What a pitiful waste she was. She was willing to give away, to throw away, the very best she had. It was one thing to sacrifice yourself for a great cause. It was another to destroy yourself for a person who didn’t even want you. It was an act of self-immolation, a sacrifice nobody wanted, that did nobody any good. What could be more tragic than that?

She thought she was independent and strong, but she got one small taste of love and she was hungrier than anyone. She was ravenous.

And another one from Bridget;

I didn’t know if it (friendship) would be possible after what we did two summers ago, but then it happened. I was happy. I loved being your friend. I admit I may have had some other thought too, but they didn’t matter to me nearly as much as being your friend. I was happy to be close to you on any terms.

And I relate this one to the same situation.

She (Lena) was still waiting for him to come back to her, even though he wasn’t going to. She was still holding out for something that wasn’t going to happen. She was good at waiting. That seemed like a sad thing to be good at.

Release me, she begged silently.

She needed to be free of him. She needed to get on with her life. Maybe even to fall in love again. She had a candidate in mind

(except I don’t have a candidate in mind)

:sigh: Yeah.

But this one isn’t deep at all. It just made me laugh.

Carmen made attempts to clean her room while she waited. In truth, she did that spasmodic, surface rearranging, like putting the random AA battery into her sock drawer to get it out of sight, that would only make the job bigger when she got down to real cleaning.

For the record, I really love these books. They are very real, and even though they are about teenage girls, I still really relate to them. Maybe that says something about my maturity level.