There’s really no other way to say it. Just a short list of all that has come together in the past two weeks:
1.) leased a beautiful apartment in a great location (and got 1.5 months of free rent!)
2.) purchased a dependable second vehicle for our family that is far more luxurious than I was anticipating
3.) Gabe and I both got jobs
4.) found great childcare for the boys (pray for Chap… he’s having a tough time being away from Mama and Daddy all day long)
5.) obtained a loan to cover our moving expenses (thanks to my parents — they have been our rock)
I mean, it’s just been overwhelming. These days, I cry at least once a day. I just do not understand the grace of God. I cannot wrap my head around why God wants to bless his children — children who consistently fall short. I am reading Jerry Bridges’ book The Discipline of Grace, and I am struggling with it. Having operating under a performance-based system for so long, I don’t know how to stop playing those tapes in my head and trust God and his Word. But I am learning. And it’s been a good journey thus far. I will forever look back on this time and be awe-struck at God’s grace and mercy for his children. It’s a mystery to me, but I’m learning to enjoy the mysterious.
Filed under: Family, God on July 21st, 2008 | 2 Comments »
Well… more like… stressing in Memphis. As I mentioned last post, I’m not all that great at managing stress. In all honesty, it’s probably one of my biggest faults. But Gabe is calm, cool, and collected in the midst of what our lives look like right now, so we balance one another out really well, and it’s encouraging to have a partner who can walk with me through the hard times and help me keep my wits.
Yesterday, we were both offered jobs contingent on our jumping through a few hoops. And if all goes well (which I’m hesitant to say it will, just because I’m pessimistic like that these days), we will both start on Monday. (AHHHHH!!!) God is so good to us. I am utterly amazed at how he walks alongside his children and guides their steps. How many times am I going to go through uncertain times and continually doubt God’s promise to bless his children before I am convinced of his grace and mercy? And no longer doubt his word? I know it’s all part of the sanctification process.. I just wish that I was more faithful. Thank you, Jesus, for loving me anyway.
We have a laundry list of things to do the rest of the week, and MY BIRTHDAY IS TOMORROW. AND LUKE’S BIRTHDAY IS SATURDAY. I love birthdays. I used to be embarrassed that I loved my birthday so much, and I wouldn’t really make a big deal out of it because I didn’t want people to know that it mattered so much to me. But then my feelings would get hurt when no one threw me a surprise party or really celebrated ‘my’ day with a bang. So, I’m putting this out there for all the world to see: I love my birthday. I love that it’s a day for people to celebrate me and tell me how special I am to them. Call me ego-centric, self-involved, whatever. I guess we all are, since we all (well, most of us anyway) celebrate the day we were born. :)
Oh, and anyone have a great daycare that takes 1 & 2 year olds and actually has openings and doesn’t cost dang near $1400 a month? Cause we need to line something up starting Monday. Eeps!
Filed under: Family, God on July 9th, 2008 | 2 Comments »
First of all, a thank you to everyone who has encouraged us in our move to the Memphis area! I still do not have a job, but I have an interview with an employment agency on Tuesday and am still plodding on in the application process with a few other positions.
I’m excited to see what God has for our family. My constant prayer is “help my unbelief.” I say I have faith in God and who he is, but does that really flesh out in my daily life? Often, my answer is a sad, “no.” And so my prayer has been that God would give me faith, trust his ways (not my own), and help me cast my anxiety on him.
My parents have been a rock for Gabe and I throughout our marriage. No matter how hard it got, no matter the pain we caused them in our choices or behavior, they have always been there. In the good and hard times. It’s easy to support someone when they act the way you want them to. It’s easy to love someone when life is easy. But the test of a person’s unconditional love is in times of hardship. And I could not be more grateful that Momma and Daddy have consistently shown us in word and action that they love us no matter what. Sometimes, I openly weep when I consider all that they have done to help us succeed as a family. And I pray to God that Gabe and I are the same for our boys. If it weren’t for Momma and Daddy, I cannot tell you where we would be. I say that in all honesty. It’s very fair to say that we would be a broken family at this point had we not been given their support, encouragement, and unconditional love.
“The greatest gift a parent can give a child is unconditional love. As a child wanders and strays, finding his bearings, he needs a sense of absolute love from a parent. There’s nothing wrong with tough love, as long as the love is unconditional.” - George H.W. Bush
Filed under: Family, God on July 6th, 2008 | 2 Comments »
We are moving to Memphis. Both Gabe and I miss our family and friends, our community. When taking a step back and evaluating where we are and why we are here, it just didn’t make sense. And when determining where to move to, between Memphis and Birmingham, Memphis made the most sense. I have numerous job contacts here, both of our families are here, it just… makes sense. Sense sense sense.
So, that’s what we’re doing. And as soon as possible. I already have one lead on a job that would, it seems, be a perfect fit for me (administrative job in the real estate field), and so I’m praying for peace. Because I’m a huge planner, and I don’t like when things are up in the air like this.
To do list:
1.) get a job
2.) buy a cheap car (we only have one, and Gabe needs it here in Starkville)
3.) find an apartment
4.) find child care for the boys
5.) join a church (this is #1 on the list, but can’t happen until Gabe gets here, which will be in August)
6.) breathe
I’m so excited! I’m so scared!
Filed under: Family on June 29th, 2008 | 11 Comments »
I ran for 30 minutes today on the treadmill. I upped my speed and incline a bit to make the run a little tougher and had a great 30 minutes. I broke up my 4.5 minute running intervals with 1.5 minute power-walking (which is actually harder for me, at times), and that helped me keep the pace up. I only had to slow down twice due to side stitches. All of this after almost two full weeks without running, and I feel great. I can’t wait to get out there tomorrow and do it again.
I haven’t been running for a few reasons. The main one is because I’ve been lazy. And it’s also been hot as heck here, which makes it 10 times harder for me to get motivated. I’ve still been walking with the boys and parking at the backs of parking lots (especially at school) to get some good walking in throughout the day, which has helped me to continue losing weight! I’m learning the importance of taking things slow and enjoying the process. I’ve decided to run a 5K in Clinton, Mississippi on July 19th. My goal for this race is to run the entire thing. And I’m positive if I keep to the training schedule I’ve made (it’s much easier than previous ones), I’ll be able to do it. So, I’m excited!
Hope all is well with you!
Filed under: Running on June 25th, 2008 | No Comments »
