Hello, Ladies and Gentlemen. I am writing this missive from my girlfriend’s house because I’m bored out of my mind and the Rumor Forum s boring me even more. Come on, men, make the Man Board mean something! Anyways, I digress.

Today’s post is authored by me and Jordan. Oh no wait, Calvin. Darnit, Caleb! Oh by the way, if you ever have children name them all really similarly so everyone will have trouble! Yeah that’s a good idea.

So today’s post will begin with me asking questions.

Dax: Do you like calendars?

Caleb: The only calendar I like is the one behind the toilet in the bathroom.

Dax: So, why that one?

Caleb: Probably because it’s the only one I ever look at… and it has good pictures.

Dax: do you have a dream car?

Caleb: Let’s say… let’s go for… a Ferarri Enzo.

Dax: Okay, how about a dream girl.

Caleb: No comment.

Dax: Oh come on. Everyone want to know.

Caleb: Let’s just say I don’t know her name yet.

Dax; is that because you’re afraid to talk to her?

Caleb: Nope. She’s wears masks because she’s so beautiful. That sounds gay.

Dax: Yes, yes it does. Does her name perhaps sound like how someone might write down a belch?

Caleb: Yeah, maybe sort of . A lot of her friends call her that, but um… probably not her friends.

Dax: So how about we talk about something else.

Caleb: Amen.

Dax: What’s it like not to have any hockey this year?

Caleb: It sucks like crap.

Dax: You’re a Leafs fan then?

Caleb: I depends what game’s on… who’s playing. I like Tampa Bay better.

Dax: You should go downtown and shout that out on a street corner. You’d get mauled.

Caleb: Yeah, but at least I was standing up for something I like.

Dax: I didn’t hear you standing up for that girl back there.

Caleb: But maybe she’s not the dream girl yet.

Dax: You mean she gets more dreamy every day until one day she’ll be the dream girl?

Caleb: Yeah, maybe.

Dax: Aren’t you a little young to be thinking about women?

Caleb: Um… um… yeah sure. That’s the first thing that comes to mind when you say “girl”.

Dax: “Um… yeah sure” is the first thing that comes to mind? Are you sure that’s a good thing?

Caleb: Probably not, but as long as my family supports me.

Dax: Yes, well, your alternative lifestyle might be a shock to them. Choosing to remain single, I mean.

Caleb: Who said I was staying single?

Dax: Well then I have no idea what we’re talking about. Let’s talk instead about, hey, nice to talk to you, but I’m afraid I have to go.

Caleb: Yes, you were a very polite interviewer… and I’ll sue you if you include anything I didn’t actually say. Also, I am disfunctional and basically a boob. That’s all I have to say and this interview is over forthwith!!!

Okay, I may have added a couple sentences there, but aren’t you glad? Didn’t it make things so much more interesting? I thought so too. Also, I’m writing this on a Mac, and I officially like the way Macs look and hate the way they function. Thank you.

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