There is nothing worse than a lippy kid. You know, one of those who thinks they can say anything to anyone in any way or at any time that they please. Just won’t shut up. It’s become epidemic, but you’re not allowed to just take them and give them the good tanning they obviously need. Really, they need some respect spanked into them good and proper.

But this brings me to that other thing. You know, how nobody has discipline these day. Like, for goodness sakes people, the truth is self-evident! You say that spanking ingrains violent tendencies in small children, but the evidence of a largly non-spanked society gone violently haywire asserts something else indeed. It boggles the mind that humans insist on believe whatever the ahem they want in face of incontrovertable facts. Is this not insanity? In fact, I think that spanking does good for a child along those lines but in the opposite way. It is a humane, guided use of violence — well, not even violence, really. Just force. It gives them a taste of what violence is like and at the same time teaches a lesson in restraint and necessity.

And in a somewhat bizarre footnote, I have to say that having a large family is an adventure in discipline. Thus, I shall never have one. There. I said it.

That’s right. You heard it first here. A geekblog in progress has been discovered at http://unshortness.blogspot.com, and there is geekiness aplenty, enough to keep even a slashdotgeek happy for like ten seconds.

Also, in other news, I got my new insurance in today, and behold! it was cheaper than it was before. And I had a 1998 Sunfire GT. I tell ya, add two doors to your car, and you’re a family man.

Now in place: a one coffee per diem cap. So that means one xl 2c in the morning and no more. Then I’ll wean myself to large. Then to medium. Then skip small and go off altogether! Darn, I’m good.

That last bit was sarcasm.

Well, here’s a link for you: Wikipedia.com, a free online encyclopedia with over 300,000 articles. All user-contributed. Pretty sweet place!

If you ever want to post mindlessly about music, you might try the CMCentral forums. Frankly, the rest of the site isn’t worth much, except to read rather inanely positive reviews, but there are some intelligent people that inhabit the forums, such as Murlough23 and bloop, and of course me. You may all laugh now. And some guy named Steve.

So on Saturday I got my new Ford Focus from the dealership, and it’s a sweet little ride. ZX5, black, all the bells and whistles (except leather and the Audiophile system). Power windows, locks, mirrors; heated seats and mirrors; traction control; A/C; and of course a tonne of bootspace (by which I of course mean trunkspace).

Set me back a fair bit of change, but because Ford Credit gave me a 0% interest loan, it’s basically like forced saving, without having to pay interest like all the other “forced savings” I do.

It’s nice though. If you finance a car on a 48 month term as opposed to a 60 month (goodness, that’s a very long time) term, they give you $1500 cash back. Of course, Mr Hamstra says that goes to show how much money they actually make on each car. I think it’s probably something to do with the fact that one extra year at 0% interest costs Ford Credit somewhere near $1G. And the fact that they’re trying to make up in volume of vehicles sold what they lost in margin on the final cost.

And so, ladies and gentlemen, automobiles have become commodity items. Ta-da!

Every once in a while I get an email from someone asking why I don’t ever post about subject x on this blog. Well people, I’m a human being. Not to sound snotty or anything to those people who post every six hours, but I have a life. A good one. I don’t have time to be the Encyclopaedia Brittanica, you know?

But the main reason is that there’s a whole lot of things I don’t care about. Like buying furniture, or the latest in car. Or baby clothing. Or why and why not someone should read Cosmo Girl. Although I start to care about it more when I see the crap that people read. No offence, Cosmo Girl. Oh wait, I also don’t care about offending Cosmo Girl. They stink. They prey on the insecurities of pre-teens. They should be hung, prominently, in the middle of my local Gap store. In effigy, of course. And then burned. With torches and pitchforks.

Of course, sometimes I start to care about things, like I just did, up there. I can’t help it. It happens.

See, I don’t like the band Kutless. They are to me everything that the Christian music scene should not be: derivitive, bland, and shallow. Obviously a product of their influences, they never actually rise above or even approach those influences. And that’s not exactly cool points for a band that lists Linkin Park as a influence, albeit a small one.

It’s time Christians stopped imitating the world. I mean, sure, take their forms. Take rock, take pop (but only a tiny little bit of it), take classical, take whatever, and make it better, not just a mediocre or even good knockoff of something someone else has already made. Why recycle crap when you can make good music? It would be one thing if Kutless was imitating the innovations of bands like Talk Talk or Godspeed You! Black Emperor. But they’re not. They’re amalgamating bands that don’t themselves make good music. Creed. Linkin Park. Those sorts of things. Add a splash of generic Christian AC (they have to have some radio play, you know), and there you have it.

Or, in my case, there I don’t have it.

Okay, it’s a big topic. And I’m not going to address it all here. Not all at once. And I’m not going to write a book on it, here or elsewhere, considering that most of my friends have been made over the last few years.

With that little bit of a disclaimer, let me begin.

Friendship requires flexibility. That’s it. No more words. Just those. The topic’s not very broad. You can learn these few words in a matter of seconds, process them, and throw them away. But don’t do that. I know it’s easy to say “be flexible” in a sort of academic, arm-chair-critic way, aknowledging the facts and then floating them on down the stream, but think about what that might mean. You need to be flexible.

This gets at the goal of all friendships. In all relationships. (And, if you can, divorce the words love and relationship from any romantic context for the time being.) I need to explain where I’m coming from first, so you can see where I’m going. What is the end result of all friendships? Is it to give? Yes, partly. Is it to get? Yes, partly. Is it to grow? Yes, again, partly. But at the end of all the being there for people, and loving, and bearing eachother up, what’s the purpose? I think it’s simple. You are friends to do nothing more than enjoy eachother.

Think about it. What’s our highest goal in life? To glorify God. That’s it. But how do you do it? By enjoying him. By finding joy in his company, in his doings, in the echoes of him you see in this world. And friendship in that context — a Christian context — is one of those God-echoes. We’re made in his image. We enjoy friends.

But there’s always going to be tension in this imperfect world. Always a bit of annoyance, maybe a friend who sometimes gets under your skin. This is where flexibility comes in. Relationships don’t belong to anyone. They’re sort of a joint chequings account, where you both have to sign on the dotted line. That means that your preferences aren’t important, or at least as important as the friendship. Within reasonable bounds, or course.

That means that sometimes you’re going to have to bend one way and not do or be something. Sometimes that means you’re going to have to say something to a friend. If you’re terribly uncomfortable in a relationship because of something that’s going on, your friendship suffers. With major issues, you can’t just set that discomfort aside. You have to deal with it. This is where the other side comes in. Because that friend needs to value the relationship just the same as you do. When you raise an issue, that friend needs to be able to process that without getting insulted or offended, and you the same.

What’s a big issue, you ask? What’s something that you should raise, what’s something that you should aside? Well, you’ll have to decide that for yourself. There’s no fast and hard rule of thumb. But here’s a little hint. If it involves a petty thing like hairstyle or the way the flip-flops drag along the ground, ignore it. Let it go. If it’s something big, like suppose you hate swearing, and your friend is swearing, raise it. And don’t be suprised if both of you have to move, not just one. Be tolerant of slip-ups, as long as they don’t cause you harm. But above all, be sure that it’s worth the trouble.

And that’s about all I have to say.

I received this insightful comment about my recent almost-rant about pride in heritages.

I guess if fighting wars and exploring worlds is what makes a heritage worthy of pride… then you have it right. Frankly I think you miss the point. There doesn’t have to be greatness and fame for someone to be proud of their heritage.

First, this person (examining note: probably adult, at least some formal education) may indeed be right. Maybe there’s something I’m missing. But if pride in heritage isn’t based in what that heritage is made of, then what is it based on? Just be proud, because?

Second, I’d like to separate Reformed from Dutch. Those words shouldn’t be used together. Dutchness is not an attribute to Ontario’s Reformed churches. It’s a detriment that needs to be excised ASAP. While I’m sort of meh about my supposed former Dutchness, I’m extremely proud of my heritage as a Reformed Christian. Not to the point of being arrogant and looking down on those wierd little Reformed Baptists and such, but it is after all the clearest view of scripture in existance.

So Mr/Mrs Annonymous, I ask that you explain your point further. If heritage isn’t based on what impact the culture or country has made in history, then what is it based on?

Just in case you don’t have enough tension in your life, welcome to the internet, where frustration is to be had… for free! (Unlike, of course, people who buy Mercedes-Benz. They actually pay for it.)

Try, for starters Frustration: The Trivia Game which promises to be the most up-to-date trivia game ever. Thank goodness for our old friends at Google who make searching for those answers either very quick, or even more frustrating.

Or, if you don’t want complex, try good old Twenty Questions versus the computer. If you can win this one, congratulations. You know some obscure stuff.

Okay, so we know the Japanese get all the cool electronics. But the Brits, man. England is so full of cool stuff. Examples: the London Tower, the now-dead Queen Mum, and about sixty thousand public houses.

Also now, The Register reports on the Big Brother Awards, a sort of Oscars for the worst of the worst privacy invaders. Included are companies, civil servants, your favorite branch of the government, and the neighbor’s dog. Okay, maybe not the dog. Read this and weep.

They should do this in the US, too. Like, there’s so much material. Really.